Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
Randomize
