Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
Randomize
