she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
Randomize
