I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
