You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
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