Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
Randomize
