Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
Randomize
