Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
Randomize
