I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
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