I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
when i woke up i was missing $380 from my bank account
damn...impressive bar tab
no i guess i bought a gasoline powered blender off ebay, i need a breathalyzer for my computer
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
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