Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
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