at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
Randomize
