That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
This dress was meant to end up on your floor
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
My drunk body wants to fuck you so bad, but my high mind is telling me it's too much work. I think I'm just gonna stay home and eat some Mac and cheese. Sorry.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Randomize
