Turn sideways at McDonald's = actual directions to a winery
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
May the power of my ass compel you!!
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
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