Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
Randomize
