I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
Randomize
