Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
