Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
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