glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
He said he wanted to have kids with me so they could grow up to be professional linebackers. Not. A. Complient.
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
Randomize