So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
I should be sponsored by Trojan
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
Randomize
