Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
she peed on how many people?
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
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