Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
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