As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
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