I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize