Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
My niece just threw up all over me. My sister's breastmilk was on my face. This is like a fucked-up porno gone terribly wrong.
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
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