new low.... made out with someone while peeing
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
The feeling are messing with the penis
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
Randomize
