Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
It's blow job season.
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
