Me too!
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
Randomize
