last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
So I figured out why that guy from Tinder stopped messaging me back. He got married.
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
I'm always down for nudity.
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
Randomize
