i just had sex bonerless
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
Randomize
