Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
Did you hear me? I HAVE THE CONTENTS OF AN NBA PLAYER'S CONDOM IN MY BEDROOM TRASHCAN!! This shit is potentially worth millions of dollars to a fertile young female who is ovulating. How do I sell it fast??
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
Randomize
