watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
Is a Chipotle burrito an acceptable "sorry I ran over your cat" gift?
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
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