This is not my ceiling
Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
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