my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Randomize
