: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
I have fence marks all over my body
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
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