Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
