I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
Randomize
