Why does Corona taste like a burp?
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
Randomize
