But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
Randomize