Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize
