But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
So many bounce houses so little time
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
Randomize
