its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
Seriously, I was a high class hooker. I was snorting shit Rachel, white powder, lines formed with credit cards, the dudes house was beautiful. Magnum condom. Adorable puppy dog. Pretty sure at some point I was sleeping on a washing machine. Boxing Gloves.
Those were the highlights of my night.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
he just fucked me for my cheese.
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