someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
Randomize
