I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
mom asked me why i'm never sober at family events, i told her i learned it from her.
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
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