Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
Nearly got hit by a blue bell ice cream truck. Can I count on you to make plenty of puns like "her life was sweet, and so was her death" at my funeral if that was to happen?
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
Randomize
