I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
Randomize
