her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
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