I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
i was born a porn star she said
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize