If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
Randomize
