Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
I need you to do me a favor and hide my sword from me tonight. I'm planning on drinking my weight in vodka and I don't trust myself enough to not run through campus screaming "I AM SPARTA!" You'll be saving me a mugshot as well as saving some innocent girls from tears.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
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