My favorite part of the day is the 2 seconds of ignorance you have when you first wake up. Right before you remember where your mouth was last night.
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Randomize
