Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
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